Sequel: Princess Slaughterhouse and the Duke of Doink show their “Ass” or Burro

Horse Slaughter

By R.T. Fitch on April 18, 2010 • ( 13 Comments )

written by the Master of Fractured Fairy Tails, R.T. Fitch

The Twisted Tale Continues – (for Big People Only)

Before disappearing off into obscurity; the Evil Princess of Wyoming and the Duke of the Kingdom Doink had formulated a plan to raise the numbers of their “Organizations of the Dead Unicorns” from three members to seven.  The politically corrupt Princess “Slaughterhouse” Sue said to the inept Duke of Doink:

“I know; let’s list all of our lies and propaganda on Facebook while ignoring the truth about Unicorn slaughter and paint it as if we really care about Unicorn welfare and try to get two or three more members through distributing and publishing misinformation.  What do you think, Dinky Duke?”

The Duke replied, “Huh?’ through half lidded eyes with just a tad bit of drool running out of the corner of his mouth.

You see, the two misguided members of defunct monarchies were living examples of the negative karma that is expended by eating sacred Unicorn flesh.  The pudgy little princess was on the verge of being ousted by good Prince De Laat, a hero from foreign crusades, and the Duke of Doink could no longer speak using multi-syllable words and was very much attracted to bright shinny objects so coming to a consensus was a very difficult mission indeed.

“Let’s start a fan club on Facebook and then we can invite all of the members to the big Unicorn BBQ when we get the law passed across the land to kill all of the four legged vermin.” growled the slovenly princess.

“Uh huh.” Nodded the Duke as his slobber wetted the front of his T-shirt which read “Half Man – Half Unicorn” with an arrow over the Man pointing up and an arrow below the Unicorn pointing down…we still don’t get it.

So the Evil Princess of Wyoming set up a page on Facebook that extolled their desire to help the poor unwanted Unicorns by killing them humanly while the Duke played a game on his laptop and kept uttering, “Here kitty, kitty…nice kitty, kitty” and the number of members grew from 1 to 7 on their page.

The rotund Princess was ecstatic.  They now had 3 official members and 7 wanna-be members and they still had tickets left for raffling off their chariot.  What a boom; more anti-Unicorn people to wage war against the most beautiful creatures in all the land.  She was so excited that she looked at the Duke of Doink with lust in her eyes but then he picked his nose and poked his finger onto the screen of his laptop and said “Duke like pretty pussy cat” and her passion waned.

But her misguided joy was short lived and quickly quelled as honest, decent folks formed a coalition called the Unicorn Welfare Alliance and quickly began to spread the truth, be it scientific fact or objective observation, across the kingdom and onto Facebook and soon the sloppy Princess was losing members on her Facebook page.

Several of her 7 fans began posting the truth and sharing positive ideas and this infuriated the Princess of slaughter so she started to delete their comments, hide the truth, twist the facts and her numbers quickly fell.

“We can’t have this”, she hollered at the Duke, “These people are not qualified to deal with the truth, they should listen to us and accept our lies for fact”, but the Duke was not listening, he was petting his laptop’s screen and whispering, “Let’s make more pretty pussy cats.”

So the Evil Princess of Wyoming pulled down her loser Facebook page and returned to her dank chambers to brood on more ways to kill and eat Unicorns while the Duke of Doink continued to sit in his boxer shorts and T-shirt, petting his computer’s screen and drifting away into the land of bad karma while the good people of the kingdom slept, unknowing of the evil that walked amongst them.

To be continued…..(because these fools don’t know when to quit)

Categories: Horse Slaughter, The Force of the Horse, Wild Horses/Mustangs

Tagged as: Animation, Arts, Cruelty to animals, Equine, Facebook, Fantasy Races and Creatures, Horse, Horse Slaughter, mentalillness, Movies, Mustang, Propaganda, Science Fiction and Fantasy, Sue Wallis, Unicorn, Wild Horses & Burros